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The Curriculum

Everything You Need to Know to Be a Master of Business Arts

ebook
1 of 1 copy available
1 of 1 copy available

From the mind of the ultimate corporate gunslinger comes this no-nonsense, real-world curriculum, designed to augment—if not replace—the more traditional path to achieving mastery of the business universe. Conquer this sharp, practical and often amusing course of study and save $250,000 of wasted business school tuition.

Unlike those august, Ivy-encrusted factories that churn out masterful business administrators, The Curriculum will teach you the art of business, employing a smart, tactical battle plan that will prove infinitely more awesome as you make your way in the world.

We begin, in the Core Curriculum, with the acquisition and maintenance of Power. Included are such essentials as Not Appearing Stupid (an early career requirement), Fabricating A Sustainable Business Personality, and the arts of Management and Selling.

The Advanced Curriculum hones the skills that are required to seize Success by the throat and shake it until valuable prizes fall out of its pockets, including fundamentals on Strategic Thinking, Self-Branding, mastering Electronic Communications, and dealing with Crazy People.

Tutorials and Electives, which students may pursue as their interest or discretion advises, include lessons on Giving an Effective Presentation, Business Drinking, and the Care and Feeding of Ultra-Senior Officers.

Lavishly enhanced with numerous charts, graphs, and other illuminating business illustrations, and backed up by years of study from Mr. Bing's proprietary research organization (The National Association of Serious Studies), The Curriculum will occupy a place of pride on any bookshelf dedicated to the study of business, how it works, and how it can be used against those who don't know how it works.

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    • Publisher's Weekly

      April 14, 2014
      Fortune columnist Bing (Executricks) offers a hilarious curriculum for educating would-be businesspeople on the ins and outs of the workplace. Dismissing the need for a higher degree from a reputable academic institution, Bing observes that "a traditional MBA does not provide you with a seminar on how to use an expense account as a strategic instrument, or how to bullshit your way through a difficult situation." To support his assertion, he cites numerous moguls who did not earn MBA's (Steve Jobs, Oprah Winfrey) as well as various corporate crooks who did (Ron Perelman). The no-holds-barred approach is often funnyâas exemplified in a chapter on "Not Appearing Stupid"âand profane, particularly in the section on "Elements of Business Personality" which addresses how to manage substance abuse. Despite his irreverent tone, Bing covers practical topics not found in master's programs (including "Managing the Boss") while touching on valid business subjects like Marketing, Sales, and Strategic Thinking. With its cheeky wit, this book is sure to be a hit among students and young businesspeople. Color illus.

    • Kirkus

      April 15, 2014
      More than a full semester's worth of advice on being successful in business. When the first chapter on a course in business addresses the issue of "Not Appearing Stupid," readers might question the veracity of the contents. However, Fortune columnist Bing (Bingsop's Fables: Little Morals for Big Business, 2011, etc.) successfully combines tongue-in-cheek commentary with helpful advice on common business practices, giving readers a lighthearted yet incisive analysis of the professional world of commerce. Starting with core ideas, such as building a persona in which "craziness" is allowed (but "just a touch. Nothing more. You are simply too small, Grasshopper"), Bing also examines how to sell, market, negotiate, and manage individuals and groups. The author's delight in his subject is apparent, though the blurred line between spoof and useful advice occasionally grates. Once readers have mastered Bing's basic principles, they are encouraged to continue on to the advanced curriculum, where topics include crisis management, how to sell yourself as a brand and develop a campaign to sell that brand, how to control the flood of electronic communications and how to interact with the seven kinds of crazy people you might encounter in the workplace. Illustrated with numerous photographs, charts, tables, graphs and formulas, where the math doesn't always add up, Bing provides tutorials and "elective" subjects that, while not mandatory, will "prepare the student for the moment when their mortarboard comes down and the rubber soles hit the road." These include the pros and cons of sex at the office, the care and feeding of senior officers, and a basic analysis of whiskey and cigars. A diploma from the "National Association for Serious Studies" concludes the book. Humorous, mostly informative guidance to the world of the "business arts."

      COPYRIGHT(2014) Kirkus Reviews, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

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